The Friday Funny (7/31/09)

A duck walks into a bar and asks, "Got any grapes?"

The bartender, confused, tells the duck no. The duck thanks him and leaves.

The next day, the duck returns and asks, "Got any grapes?"

Again, the bartender tells him, "No -- the bar does not serve grapes, has never served grapes and, furthermore, will never serve grapes." The duck thanks him and leaves.

The next day, the duck returns, but before he can say anything, the bartender yells, "Listen, duck! This is a bar! We do not serve grapes! If you ask for grapes again, I will nail your stupid duck beak to the bar!"

The duck is silent for a moment, and then asks, "Got any nails?"

Confused, the bartender says no.

"Good!" says the duck. "Got any grapes?"

Bloomin' Easy

I just loved this layout from Clean and Simple Stamping. It was the Fall-To Layout last week. The flower, from Bloomin' Doodles, is stamped, colored with Copics, cut out, and covered with Glossy Accents. I also used Say It In Script, which is this week's product of the week, and therefore 20% off!
How 'bout that background paper? I love the new digital paper pack made to go with this stamp set. It's called Bloomin' Doodles also. Here's a little peek at how I printed my paper(s). I cropped a quarter of a sheet of each of these four papers and added them all to one document. I use PhotoShop Elements. That way I can get a variety of papers on only one sheet. Because I never use whole sheets anyway. They just end up laying around, making a mess of my stamping desk. You can see how they print with a border, since I don't have a borderless printer. At least not that I know of. LOL. So they work perfectly for layering on 4.25 x 5.5 inch cards.

What's In It?

Stamps: bloomin doodles, say it in script (Lizzie Anne Designs) Paper: bloomin doodles digi papers (Lizzie Anne), pearl white (paper accents), white (pti), pale plum (SU) Ink: black (memento), pale plum (SU) Copics: V09, V15, YG03, YG63 Other: label 1 (spellbinders), thread, sewing machine, glossy accents (ranger), brads, paper piercer and template (SU), pop dots, white gel pen

Life's Moments

This week's Jacksonbelle Embellishments challenge is to use Pink Paislee or October Afternoon products. Can you say YUM? I had a hard time choosing between the two, but opted for this Pink Paislee Office Lingo line in the end. I also finished it off with a Basic Grey pearl on my flower and some fun May Arts ribbon. Finished card is 3.5" x 6". What's In It?
Stamps: beautiful you (Verve) Paper: office lingo (pink paislee), turquoise (SU), raspberry, white (pti) Ink: onyx black (VersaFine), turquoise, pink passion, kiwi (SU) Other: flat clip (Making memories), ribbon (may arts), dotted wave punch (EK), nesties and flower creations(spellbinders), grass/ivy pearl (basic grey), white gel pen, pop dots, sponge daubers

Now, be sure to see what the rest of the team has done, and let us know on the Jbelle blog if you've decided to play along!

Kristine Breach
Tobi Crawford
Stephanie Hargis
Mitzi Koons
Loretta Lock
Jimmi Mayo
Michelle Philippi
Carly Robertson
Shemaine Smith
Lynda Benden
Melissa Bove
Jennifer Buck
Jill Dunn
AJ Otto
Heather Lee-Reppen
Lindsey Botkin
Trudee Sauer

Thank You Berries

This is one of those cards that looks (and is) so simple, but it took me forever to make. I had to step away and come back later twice. But now I'm pretty pleased with it. I used several of the challenges from this weekend's Dare To Get Dirty extravaganza on Splitcoast Stampers, including one of the sketches. If you're a Fan Club member, you can play along too.

Design note: I colored the pearls to match with a B05 Copic markerWhat's In It?

Stamps: strawberries (Lockhart stamps), green thumb (PTI) Paper: real red, caribbean, artichoke (SU), white, spring moss (PTI) Ink: artichoke (SU), black (memento), chamomile (PTI) Copics: R20, R24, R29, YG91, YG95, YG99, B00, B02, B05, W3 Other: score pal, spots and dots (CB), ribbon (may arts), pearls (Mike's), square and scalloped nesties (Spellbinders), pop dots, white gel pen, corner rounder

Grow With Love

Can you believe I actually have something for you on a Saturday? For once, I have a few extra cards at the end of the week. I hope you like it!
I used this week's Lizzie Anne sketch by Kendra, though I forgot to add in the twist of adding some gems to your card. (oops) I stamped the July release single, Grow with Love, using Memento ink on Papertrey white card stock and die cut with the Spellbinder's Labels 4 dies, including a mat for layering.

Money saving tip: Just buy white thread (and maybe brown and black). Then, before sewing, color a length with a Copic marker to match any project. It only takes a few seconds. I leave my machine threaded. Pull the thread out past the needle, and color. Then re-wind the spool. That way you don't have to go through the whole up, down, loop, over, in, etc. threading process.

You can now find all of the new Lizzie Anne stamps available for sale, here, on their new release page.

So far, my plans are pretty low key for the next couple of days. I hope you have a great weekend.

What's In It?

Stamps: Grow with Love (Lizzie Anne Designs)

Paper: pink pirouette, soft sky (SU), white (pti), lily pad (Bazzill), pretty please: flower drops (my mind's eye)

Ink: tuxedo black (memento)

Copics: B00, R43, R24, YR04, YG91, BG93

Other: labels 4 nesties (Spellbinders), ribbon (american crafts), SEI brad, thread, sewing machine

ETA: I just found out that Lizzie Anne is having their Spellbinder's dies 40%!!! Holy freakin' deal. I'll let you know if I get any more details. Get them before they're gone. I know I'm going shopping.

Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie

Have you heard about Lizzie Anne's new Montly Mix kits yet? Be sure to follow that link if you'd like more info. Because, not only are these sets so fun and versatile, they're also a great deal with even more perks for club members. You can even get free shipping on the first month if you sign up before August 1.
This card uses the August Monthly Mix: Hey Sunshine! and this week's sketch challenge at Splitcoast Stampers. I stamped the three swimsuits (all one stamp) individually to get my three panels, then colored with Copics. After I colored them, the middle suit reminded me of Wonder Woman. LOL! I know you all want a suit just like this now, don't you?

What's In It?
Stamps~ August Monthly Mix: Hey Sunshine! (LAD), polka dot basics (PTI)
Paper~ bashful blue, ballet blue, real red (SU), yellow from celebration (American Crafts), white (Georgia Pacific)
Ink~ tuxedo black (memento), rea red (SU), Versamark
Copics~ B32, B95, YG03, Y38, R29
Other~ square and label 1 nesties (Spellbinders), hello kitty flower bouquet die (Sizzix), paper piercer and template, clear embossing powder (SU), pop dots

It's another preview day at Lizzie Anne Designs. But I don't have any of those peeks for you today. When you're done here, you can head over to the Lizzie Anne blog for full set reveals, sample ideas, and give aways. That's right. Make sure you enter to win EACH DAY's stamp sets. You still have time to enter all three.

The Friday Funny (7/23/09)

WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:

Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from such simple creatures. Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

One mood all the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life. One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache.

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.