It's Not All Black and White

Friday, October 26, 2007

The Friday Funny

This is the message that the Pacific Palisades High School ( California ) staff voted unanimously to record on their school telephone answering machine.This is the actual answering machine message for the school This came about because they implemented a policy requiring students and parents to be responsible for their children's absences and missing homework. The school and teachers are being sued by parents who want their children's failing grades changed to passing grades - even though those children were absent 15-30 times during the semester and did not complete enough schoolwork to pass their classes.

The outgoing message:

"Hello! You have reached the automated answering service of your school. In order to assist you in connecting to the right staff member, please listen to all the options before making a selection:

* To lie about why your child is absent - Press 1

* To make excuses for why your child did not do his work - Press 2

* To complain about what we do - Press 3

* To swear at staff members - Press 4

* To ask why you didn't get information that was already enclosed in your newsletter and several flyers mailed to you - Press 5

* If you want us to raise your child - Press 6

* If you want to reach out and touch, slap or hit someone - Press 7

* To request another teacher, for the third time this year - Press 8

* To complain about bus transportation - Press 9

* To complain about school lunches - Press 0

* If you realize this is the real world and your child must be accountable and responsible for his/her own behavior, class work, homework and that it's not the teachers' fault for your child's lack of effort: Hang up and have a nice day!

*If you want this in Spanish, you must be in the wrong country.

Thursday, October 25, 2007

Let It SNOW!

Okay, so here's what's going on with me for the next few days. Today I'm trying to completely clean my house, because someone is coming to stay here with Buster while we go to Vegas for the week. Tonight we have hockey tickets to the Penguins game. Tomorrow Josh and I are going to my mom's to take her to radiation. We live pretty far away so this will take most of the daylight hours. That leaves Friday evening and any spare minutes I can find to pack for our trip to Vegas. We leave early Saturday morning. It's a business trip for Josh, so I'm going to try taking a few stamping supplies in case I have some extra time to blow while he's busy. I also try to go to a different one of the spas each time I'm there. (We go every year, pretty much.) They are so over the top. I love it!

So here's a card that I finished earlier and haven't shared with you yet. It's basically self-explanatory except for perhaps the trim across the bottom. That's the "other" side you get when you make scallops with the slit punch. Then I added a dot of Crystal Effects, covered in glitter, to each of the points.

If you like those lovely snowflakes behind the "SNOW", Verve Visual plans to have more in stock by early November. It's such a great set at a great price (ten bucks) that the original shipment sold out.

I'm off to do some more cleaning. YUCK! Hope you're having a great day!

What's In It?
Winter Wonder (Verve Visual)Paper: White (Papertrey Ink); Pearlized White (Paper Accents); Old World Mat Stack (DCWV); Vintage Violet, Certainly Celery (Stampin' Up!)Ink: Night Sky, Tea Leaves, Aegean Blue, Sea Breeze, Key Lime (Versamagic)Accessories: Chipboard (K-ology); Crystal Effects, Slit Punch Iridescent Ice Embossing Powder(Stampin' Up!); Crystal glitter (Stickles); Pop Dots (All Night Media)

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Dinner Party

Here are a few little ideas to add some character to your next dinner party. All of the circle elements are identical, using Verve Visual's Seasonal Circles stamp set. I stamped the solid center flower in Bashful Blue, the solid ring of flowers in So Saffron and both outlines in Chocolate Chip, all on Whisper White. I cut these out with my Coluzzle, mounted on Chocolate and trimmed with scalloped scissors. This would be much quicker if you have the right punches or Nestabilities, but alas, mine are on back order. According to Julee, the Super Jumbo punch is the best size.

For the napkin ring, the loop of card stock going around the napkin is about five inches long, then the decoration is just adhered right on top. The base of the name card is about 2.25 by 3.25 inches. The name is handwritten, because I thought that looked best with the crumpled, torn paper. You could also print it off a computer.

You can get the template for the Peek-a-boo box here, as it was this week's Technique Lover's Challenge. Sorry I can't show you the box filled...I refuse to keep chocolate in the house "for crafting". LOL. I think it would work great for two or three small peppermint patties or some Andies Candies though. You can also see here how I threaded the ribbon through a hole punched in the middle of the flower before knotting it. Feel free to add a hand written sentiment of appreciation for your guest.

What's In It?

Stamps: Seasonal Circles (Verve Visual)
Paper: Chocolate Chip, Whisper White (Stamping Up!); Urban Couture: Cashmere (Basic Grey)Ink: Chocolate Chip, Bashful Blue, So Saffron (Stampin' Up!)

Accessories: Coluzzle; scallop scissors (ProvoCraft); Antique Brads (Lasting Impressions); Taupe Grosgrain ribbon (Stampin' Up!); acetate window sheet

Monday, October 22, 2007

Baby Steps

I am so happy with this card! Is it the greatest card in the world? Of course not. But I stepped out of my box a bit. It was just a baby step, but it's a start. What box? I am such a "linear" stamper. Everything is a box, square, layered precisely. It's just how I think. But, when I'm looking at others' cards, I really love designs that are looser, abstract, for lack of a better description. So, what do you think, did a make a little progress? I hope to keep working at it.

I saw on Daniela's blog that she had posted a challenge over at Create My Keepsake to make a fall/thank you card using fall colors, ribbon, and a stamp. So I used my bucket of apples stamp, again. Yes, you may be getting sick of it, but I just love this stamp. It's stamped on watercolor paper and colored with markers and a watercolor brush. The same goes for the cut out leaves.

By the way, the watercolor paper is so thick that it makes great little cut out embellishments.

I also faux stitched my background paper (with a paper piercer and chocolate chip marker) and rolled up the edges. The sentiment was stamped (chocolate chip) on watercolor paper and punched with the word window tab.

What's In It?
Stamps: Give Thanks (Stampin' Up!)
Paper: Stamper's Select White (Papertrey Ink); watercolor, retired Bravo Burgundy (Stampin' Up!); Everyday "Cherished" (My Mind's Eye)
Ink: Onyx Black (Versafine); chocolate chip, various markers for coloring (Stampin' Up!)
Accessories: Purely Pomegranate stitched ribbon, word window and slot punches, Crafter's Tool Kit, watercolor brush (SU!); Giga scallop punch (Marvy)

Saturday, October 20, 2007

Surf's Up!

I love cute stamps, and this little penguin from Memory Box really fits the bill. I stamped him with Onyx Black Versafine on watercolor paper and colored with markers and a water brush. I picked these funky papers from Pink Martini and chose my colors from there. I love how the swirls in the paper mimic the waves I *tried* to paint under my little surfer. The "surf's up!" is stamped with Karen Foster mini casual snap stamps. Thanks to Beate for her Weekend Sketch Challenge, which I used for this card.

What's In It?
Stamps: Surfer Penguin (memory box)
Ink: Onyx Black (Versafine); Going Gray, Taken with teal, old olive, pumpkin pie, bashful blue, soft sky (Stampin' Up!)
Paper: basic black, taken with teal, watercolor (SU!); Orange Creamsicle (Pink Martini)
Accessories: water pen; star eyelets (SU! retired)

Friday, October 19, 2007

Thanks Allison!

I just wanted to pop in to show off this gorgeous RAK from Allison at Stampin' When I Can. Actually, it's a RAK-back! LOL. That is too funny. Thanks Allison. I remember admiring this when you posted it on your blog. The colors are so pretty and cheerful, just like that smiling Bella.

Calling Cathy M. and The Friday Funny

Cathy M. you left a comment for a RAK yesterday, but I have no way of getting hold of you. Email me your address, and I'll get your card out right away. Just click "Email Me" -----------> over there, under my picture. If I don't hear from you today, I'll choose another commenter. Thanks.

And now, on to your regularly scheduled Friday Funny:

These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are
things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and
now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm
while these exchanges were actually taking place.

ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?

ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan!

ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
WITNESS: We both do.
WITNESS: Yes, voodoo.

ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his
sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty-one.
ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Are you shitt'in me?
ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Uh.... I was gett'in laid!
ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Are you shittin me? Your Honor, I think I need a different
attorney. Can I get a new attorney?
ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Now whose death do you suppose terminated it?
ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a
deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead
WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people. Would you
like to rephrase that?
ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an
autopsy on him!
ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Huh....are you qualified to ask that question?
And the best for last:

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you
began the autopsy?
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing

Thursday, October 18, 2007

Who Wants It?

This week's sketch challenge at Splitcoast is my favorite "old standby" design. If I'm really stuck, this one always works. Today I used my new Memory Box stamp set, At The Zoo. It has the cutest selection of solid animal images, each with a matching sentiment. I pressed the giraffe into So Saffron ink, then rolled in Pumpkin Pie, and stamped. Then I used a chocolate chip marker to color his spots and give him an eye and lashes. After masking off his legs, I added the small A Muse oval for ground. Can you see the bits of sky I added on the top part? It's pretty subtle. I used a sponge dauber to lightly apply some Soft Sky ink.

What's In It?
Stamps: At The Zoo (Memory Box); small skinny oval (A Muse)
Ink: So saffron, pumpkin pie, soft sky, close to cocoa, chocolate chip (Stampin' Up!); Timber Brown (StazOn)
Paper: So saffron, chocolate chip, whisper white, pumpkin pie, So Saffron Prints (Stampin' Up!); Picket Fence (My Mind's Eye)
Accessories: Earth elements brads (Stampin' Up!); ribbon (Cherries); scallop scissors (ProvoCraft); spots and dots embossing folder (Cuttlebug); dimensionals

Now, as to this post's title...

A few days ago, Julia was having a blog give away. To enter, you had to let her know something nice you're doing for another person(s). Among other things, I said I would send out three RAK's. Well, terrible me never did it. So, the first three people to comment on this post saying you'd like a RAK, shall receive one. I'll use this card and two others from my stash. Be sure you leave a way for me to contact you for your address. By the way, RAK means Random Act of Kindness, in this case, sending a card for no particular reason.

Monday, October 15, 2007

Bucket of Apples

I made this card really quickly (at least for me) so I'd have something to share with you yesterday morning. Yesterday morning? Yep! I rushed through my morning, and then Blogger wouldn't let me upload any pictures. Same thing happened last night. So, here ya go. You get it this morning.

I made this with Sunday's Featured Stamper challenge at Splitcoast. Here is StamperTammy's card that I cased. Isn't it pretty? You can see that I stuck with the layout and fall theme, but changed up the colors, image, and brads.
I also used Julie Buhler's tutorial on coloring with Stampin' Up! markers. I was pretty happy with the results considering how quickly I was trying to make this card. I'll definitely come back to this technique when I have more time.
What's In It?
Stamps: Give Thanks (Stamin' Up!)
Paper: Chocolate Chip, Real Red, watercolor (Stampin' Up!); Urban Couture (Basic Grey)
Ink: Wheat (Versamagic); real red, certainly celery, old olive, going grey, so saffron, close to cocoa (Stampin' Up!)
Other: red grosgrain ribbon and eyelets(SU!); scalloped scissors (ProvoCraft); paper distressor (Tim Holtz); water brush; white glaze pen (Sakura)

Friday, October 12, 2007

The Friday Funny


In pharmacology, all drugs have two names, a trade name and generic name. For example, the trade name of Tylenol also has a generic name of Acetaminophen. Aleve is also called Naproxen. Amoxil is also called Amoxicillin and Advil is also called Ibuprofen.

The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After careful consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin. Also considered were Mycoxafailin, Mydixadrupin, Mydixarizin, Dixafix, and of course, Ibepokin.

Pfizer Corp. announced today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form, and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer. It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one. Obviously we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of "cocktails", "highballs" and just a good old-fashioned "stiff drink". Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of:

Thought for the day: There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.

Thursday, October 11, 2007


I was inspired to pull out my (only) Lizzie Anne Designs stamp set, Jolies Fleurs, for their Cards for Cancer contest. How long do you think I can hold out 'til I buy a few more of their gorgeous sets? I have an insider tip that it won't be too long. LOL.

I used this week's Sketch Challenge from Splitcoast Stampers for my layout and things went fairly quickly from there. The designer papers are from the Basic Grey Perhaps paper pad and I added Stampin' Up's kraft and purely pomegranate. The flower is stamped on Paper Accents pearlized white using Onyx Black Versafine. Then I colored with markers (blush blossom, close to cocoa, so saffron, regal rose, certainly celery). I added the dots along the flower stems with a black Millennium pen. Topped it all with a little Star Dust Stickles. Layered a couple of ribbons from Michael's and tied them off with a bit of retired Stampin' Up! Neutral Fancy Fibers. I think they still sale something very similar. That main panel is edged with paper piercing and scalloped scissors.

So, can you see the sentiments (yes, plural, senitmentS) on this card? They're pretty subtle. I'm really into my Crate Words rub-ons. There's an all capital "THANK YOU" at the bottom and a smaller "much thanks" running vertically on the left side.

What's In It?
Stamps: Jolies Fleurs (Lizzie Anne Designs)
Ink: Onyx Black (Versafine); pure black (Millennium pen); close to cocoa, certainly celery, blush blossom, regal rose, so saffron (Stampin' Up!)
Paper: Perhaps (Basic Grey); pearlized white (Paper Accents); kraft, purely pomegranate (Stampin' Up!)
Accessories: silver brads, neutral fancy fibers, paper piercer and template (Stampin' Up!); Star Dust Stickles; rub-ons (Crate Words); polka dot ribbon (Dashes, Dots & Checks); striped green ribbon (Textured Trios); scallop scissors (ProvoCraft)

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

New Stamps!

That got your attention, didn't it?

Are you making your winter cards yet? Are you looking for some great stamp sets to work with for the season? Check out the TWO new releases from Verve Visual, available today. And get this...Each set is only TEN BUCKS! Considering the low price, you'll be amazed at how much you get. Go check it out! While you're there, be sure to stop by the gallery, with over 30 projects using these new sets, including some by new design team member Charmaine Ikach and Guest Designer Taylor Van Bruggen.

This card uses the Winter Wonder stamp set with a classy winter color scheme: White, soft sky, blue bayou and black.

The main image is stamped in Versamark and embossed with Iridescent Ice embossing powder. After that, I sponged Soft Sky all around it and added the "Winter Wonderland" sentiment. This, of course, was all done on a Whisper White giga scalloped square punch out. I layered it on blue bayou and black, then dotted with a white glaze pen.

The blue bayou background is stamped in cloud white Versamagic, then covered in Iridescent Ice EP. You have to work fairly quickly if you want to emboss this ink, since it is a chalk ink, not a full fledged pigment ink. I did mine in three steps, rather than stamping it all, then embossing. The other background (Soft Sky), was dry embossed with the Cuttlebug D'Vine embossing folder.

What's In It?
Stamps: Winter Wonderland (Verve Visual)
Paper: Stamper's Select White (Papertrey Ink); Whisper White, Blue Bayou, Soft Sky, Basic Black (Stampin' Up!)Ink: Black (Versafine); Versamark; Cloud White (Versamagic); Soft Sky (Stampin' Up!)
Accessories: Slot punch, Irridescent Ice Embossing Powder (Stampin' Up!); Giga scallop punch (Marvy Uchida); D'vine embossing folder (Cuttlebug); White glaze pen (Sakura); sponge; ribbon (miscellaneous)

So stop by at Verve and check out the sets. Let me know what you think.

Tuesday, October 9, 2007

Fresh Bloom = Fresh Card

I got some time today to finish up that card I told you I started yesterday morning.

I love going to visit my mom every week (usually Mondays). I feel like I'm helping in a situation that is much out of our hands. I clean, do a little laundry, grocery shopping if she needs it. Just whatever. AND, it sets a schedule and a reason for me to visit with my mom. I have a purpose in going, therefore I go. But it really does make for a long day with the driving and all. There was no stamping time last night.

This card uses Fresh Bloom stamped on watercolor paper in Timber Brown. What a great name for that flower. It really is fresh! I colored it with a water brush and dye inks. Then I went over a few highlights in the center with my white glaze pen. (LOVE that thing) Do you have Stampin' Up's new chocolate chip taffeta ribbon? It's gorgeous, but not very chocolaty in color. I was wondering if it's just mine. It looks more basic gray. Anyway, the card hinges on the left, so I cut a slot in the fold so my ribbon could go the whole way around the card front. The sentiment, which includes those doodled ovals, is stamped in Timber Brown on whisper white and trimmed out with mini scallop scissors. To balance the design a bit, I glued down some small crystals in the top corner and on the sentiment. The background papers are both sides of a sheet from Chatterbox.

What's In It?
Stamps: Stampendous Fresh Bloom, Hero Arts Designer Words set
Paper: Stampers Select White (Papertrey Ink); whisper white, chocolate chip, watercolor (Stampin' Up!); Nook Circles (Chatterbox)
Ink: Timber Brown (StazOn); cameo coral, mellow moss, close to cocoa (Stampin' Up!)
Other: White Glaze Pen (Sakura); mini scallop scissors (ProvoCraft); water brush, chocolate chip taffeta ribbon (Stampin' Up!), miscellaneous crystals

I've Gone Pink!

for Breast Cancer Awareness Month. I'm a little behind, since today is already the ninth. But I wanted to make a new pink banner for my blog, and I am very slow on the Photoshop learning curve.

If you're looking for a little something you can do to help with breast cancer awareness, here's something that won't cost you a penny and will only take a minute out of your day. Go to the Breast Cancer Site. Click on the "Click here to give - It's Free" button. With each click, the site's sponsors give a little bit toward free mamograms. Bookmark it. Click it every day. It only takes a minute. You may help save a woman's life with early breast cancer detection.

Monday, October 8, 2007

Verve Visual Sneak Peek

It's only two more days until TWO new stamp sets are released by Verve Visual. So, here's a little peek to whet your appetite. This card uses a few of the stamps from Seasonal Circles. I'll just list a recipe, since you can see all the details today at the Verve blog, not to mention another fab sneak peek by Jen del Muro.

What's In It:
Stamps: Seasonal Circles (Verve Visual)
Paper: Chocolate Chip, River Rock (Stampin' Up!); Pearlized white (Paper Accents); Be Good (Cosmo Cricket)
Ink: Timber Brown (StazOn); Certainly Celery, Sage Shadow, Not Quite Navy, Chocolate Chip (Stampin' Up!)
Accessories: Rub-On (Crate Words); Circle Punches, Slit Punch (Stampin' Up!); Ribbon (American Crafts); large rhinestone (Darice); small rhinestones (misc.)

I did start another card this morning, but I'm heading off to my mom's soon. So maybe I'll get it finished tonight or tomorrow and be able to share with you all. {{{HUGS}}}

Friday, October 5, 2007

Vintage Butterfly

Hey there! I've actually got a card for you today! But first, I wanted to let you know that the Sneak Peaks for Verve Visual's October 10 release are happening over at the Verve blog. In fact, it started a couple of days ago. And you do not want to miss a single one of the amazing cards my fellow designers have cooked up! In fact, I'll have something to share on Monday. So be sure to stop back.
Now, for today's card. I was in the mood for purple, so I pulled out some of my leftover Vintage Violet card stock and ribbon, and paired it up with Papertrey's Butterfly Kisses. The butterfly is celery and violet stamped on whisper white with some wire antennae. I layered that on Kraft with the dotted trail from Little Lady and a hand drawn border (Elegant Eggplant marker). The striped paper is Basic Grey and the dotted paper I stamped with a few of the MANY bits and pieces in the Butterfly Kisses set. I used Vintage Violet, Certainly Celery and Tempting Turquoise, then sponged the edges. I attached a few strips of ribbon with brads to go with the sketch I was using, CPS #2. I finished with some piercing and the sentiment on bottom (in black Versafine).

What's In It:
Stamps: Butterfly Kisses and Little Lady (Papertrey Ink)
Paper: Vintage Violet, Confetti White, Whisper White, Kraft (Stampin' Up!), Skate Shoppe (Basic Grey)
Ink: Vintage Violet, Elegant Eggplant, Tempting Turquoise, Certainly Celery (Stampin' Up!), black (Versafine)
Other: silver wire (Darice), ribbon, brads, paper piercer (Stampin' Up!), dimensionals, sponge

Monday, October 1, 2007

friend, joy, love

Those are the words on the sentiment tags for this anniversary card, since you can't see them all in the pic.

This is gonna be a real quickie this morning, because I need to be off to spend the day with my mom. No update there, other than that she actually started chemo last week.

I stamped the fern from Papertrey Ink's Text Boxed set using Mellow Moss on vanilla card stock. Then added the dots in Close to Cocoa. I trimmed it out and used the Cracked Glass Technique. This is the first I've tried it and it really is pretty cool. Be sure you crack it right after you take it from the freezer. Once it warms up again, it won't crack. But you can re-freeze and give it a few extra cracks if you're too slow ... like me.

I mounted that on Mellow Moss, then chocolate chip with the corners punched. And all that is set on dimensionals. The green paper is Basic Grey, layered on paper pierced Close to Cocoa. The dotted brown paper is EK Success.

I cut the word window tabs to different lengths and punched with a 1/16th inch hole punch. Used an O-ring to attach to pewter Hodgepodge Hardware. I thought it would make a nice anniversary card. I'll stamp the actual "Happy Anniversary" inside.

I'm off. {{{HUGS}}} to ya.

What's In It:
Stamps: Papertrey Ink Text Boxed
Paper: Stampin Up Very Vanilla, Chocolate Chip, Mellow Moss, Close To Cocoa, EK Success Mint Espresso, Basic Grey Urban Couture Loselle
Ink: Mellow Moss, Close to cocoa, versamark, chocolate chip
Other: ticket corner punch, pewter hodgepodge hardware, celery grosgrain ribbon, word window punch, paper piercer, o ring, 1/16th hole punch, ultra think embossing powder (glassy glaze)